It's A Mystery To Me - The Game Commences
For The Usual Fee - Plus Expences
Confidential Information - It's In A Diary
This Is My Investigation - It's Not A Public Inquiry


I Go Checking Out The Reports - Digging Up The Dirt
You Get To Meet All Sorts In This Line Of Work
Treachery An Reason - There's Always An Excuse For It
And When I Find The Reason I Still Get Used To It


And What Have You Got At The End Of The Day?
What Have You Got To Take Away?
A Bottle Of Whisky And A New Set Of Lies
Blinds On The Window And A Pain Behind The Eyes


Scarred For Life - No Compensation
Private Investigation