I Wake Up Every Morning, Six O'clock, I`m Right On Time

I Eat A Low Fat Breakfast, I Tie A Perfect Tie

I Kiss The Wife, I Hug The Kids, I Pat The Dogs And Cats

I Never Lose Anything, My Car Keys Or My Hat



'Cause I`m The Man Of The Year

I`m The Man Of The Year



I Never Cheat At Finals, Or Miss A Day At School

My Urine Tests Are Perfect, My Prostate Is A Jewel



'Cause I`m The Man Of The Year

I`m The Man Of The Year

'Cause I`m The Man Of The Year

I`m Never, Ever Jealous

Never, Ever Cruel

I`m A Graduate Of Harvard

Where I Never Broke The Rules



The Queen Made Me A Knight

The Pope Made Me A Saint

The President Plays Golf With Me

I Make Madonna Faint



So Why Am I So Lonely

Depressed And In Despair

If I Pull This Trigger In My Mouth Will Anybody Care



It Was The Greatest Funeral, I Laid In Perfect State

And Later I Will Meet The Lord, I Bet He Just Can`t Wait



To Meet The Man Of The Year

I`m The Man Of The Year

Stand In Line To Meet The Man

I`m The Man, I`m The Man, I`m The Man